TBH, with all of the BDSM sites I've been checking out lately, I've had a lot of questions and thoughts on the scene as a whole. I was talking to someone I met on one of the spicier sites, and they told me that I should check out FetLife, a platform for exchanging information, stories, and ideas.
What is FetLife and who is it for?
FetLife is not technically a dating site; it's more of an online social networking platform where people can talk about their kinks, fetishes, and BDSM fantasies.
Founded in 2008, the FetLife site was created on the basis of providing a safe place for people to bond over similar sexual interests. Instead of focusing on finding a romantic relationship, FetLife centers on connecting others so they can discuss, educate, and explore one another's interests with BDSM and all things spicy.
The homepage says it has over 10.7 million members, 167k+ groups, and 16k+ events/meetups.
Is FetLife legit?
The answer depends on your definition of legit. As far as this being a real site where people can legitimately connect, then yes. As far as safety comes though, it's not as legit. While doing my FetLife review, a few Google results hinted at some FetLife related crimes. My personal opinion is that it's a legit site to use on its own, but with real repercussions if you're not careful!
It looks like they've improved their verification process and will be prioritizing profiles that choose to do it. Users can verify with their government ID, or a profile picture!
How does FetLife.com work?
FetLife works a bit differently because it focuses more on the social aspect than the matching aspect. Once you sign up, you're dropped into a main feed that's similar to a social network. You'll be able to post updates, photos, videos, writings in order to meet and connect with others.
FetLife doesn't "match" you with anyone since its focus is on community and finding others to have fun with, so you're left to explore the filters, groups and feeds on your own.
The tl;dr on FetLife
How to delete FetLife account: Click on your profile pic, click on "account", then "deactivate/delete my account". Tap on permanently delete, confirm password, and click delete account.
Is FetLife free? FetLife does have free options! It's mostly free, with some paid features.
What is FetLife's 'Kinktionary'? A list of BDSM terms to help newcomers or those who don't know a certain term.
Does FetLife have 2FA? They do!! In your account settings, there's an option to set it up.
Is there a FetLife mobile app?
Yes there is a FetLife app, but you won't find it on Google Play or the App Store. You need to install it as a Progressive Web App (PWA) through your browser.
Free vs. FetLife Supporter subscriptions
Free features include: join discussions, search for pics/posts, browse local kinksters, send messages, follow others, check out events, upload pics and vids, post writings, create photo albums, organize events, start groups, and search fetish tags.
For only $5/month you can support FetLife and get: "I support FetLife" badge, view all pics/vids/writings, look at everything you liked and bookmarked, go back 25x further in your activity feed, and customize the activity feed.
Pricing: $30 for 6 months, $60 for 12 months, $120 for 24 months, $240 for life!
What sets FetLife apart?
- Discrete mode: Replaces the mobile app logo with a generic logo and hides site info on notifications.
- Discover events: Search for events using FetLife's map to connect with locals.
- Lots of groups: Plenty of active groups to join about any fetish.
- Kinks & fetishes directory: Add what turns you on to your profile.
- Social aspect: Browse feeds, writings, and activity — deeper than typical dating sites.
- Relationship display: Tag someone as who you're in a relationship with (including D/S relationships!).
- Price: Super cheap compared to other BDSM sites.
Final thoughts for my FetLife review
I really enjoyed exploring FetLife and all it had to offer. However, since this is not a dating site, not everyone has the best intentions in mind, so exercise extreme caution when meeting someone. I was able to chat with a few people who were on my level, but overall I wasn't into the full community style as I'm looking for a hottie to connect with on a range of interests rather than strictly BDSM.
